HAPPY IS THE MAN

By Mickey Chandler

olomon, the wise man of Israel, wrote: "Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate" (Psalm 127:3-5).

s my wife and I prepare ourselves for the arrival of our second child, my thoughts are turned to Solomon's words. "Children are an heritage of the LORD." Can you think of anything more wonderful than that?

rom the beginning, God ordained the marriage relationship to be that into which children were to be brought into the world. It is the "marriage bed" that is termed "undefiled" but fornication and adultery that are condemned (Heb. 13:4). Is it any wonder after just a brief look at how that relationship was established?

n Gen. 2:24, we see the establishment of the marriage relationship: "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." The relationship described here is one that is closer than the bonds of family love. The love that a man and a woman feel for each other is supposed to be so strong that it drives them to leave their parents so that they might have a life together. They become, as God puts it, "one flesh."

t is into this kind of deep, loving relationship that God desires children come. Unfortunately, our society does not follow God's plan for the family. Divorce is rampant in our society and that causes its own set of problems with our heritage from the Lord. In 1991, P. R. Amato and B. Keith examined the results of 92 studies involving 13,000 children ranging from preschool to young adulthood to determine what the overall results indicated. The overall result of this analysis was that children from divorced families are on average somewhat worse off than children who have lived in intact families. These children have more difficulty in school, more behavior problems, more negative self-concepts, more problems with peers, and more trouble getting along with their parents.

his, of course, is not to say that all children of broken homes experience problems, nor is it to say that children of homes where the parents live together and love each other do not experience these same problems. But, it should be telling to us that the majority of the available evidence affirms God's plan as to what is best for children.

his, all too often, has been forgotten by today's society. We look at children from broken homes "acting up" and wonder where they went wrong. The problem, though, from the beginning of their problems, was the selfish desire of the children's parents to see after their own lusts instead of living after God's plan for them. The result of that type of living is ruinous not only for the souls of the parents, but for the children's as well. These are not children of which Solomon speaks.

he presumption that Solomon makes in his statement is that the children are reared properly. They have a respect for their parents, they obey them. They perform the duties that children are expected to perform under God's plan for the family. We see this by looking at the next book in the Bible: Proverbs. There, Solomon, the same writer as Psalm 127, talks about children who refuse to follow the ways of the Lord. He does not describe them in terms that would tell us that they are a joy to their parents.

 wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish son is the heaviness of his mother." (Prov. 10:1). "A foolish son is a grief to his father, and bitterness to her that bare him" (Prov. 17:25). These are not the children that Solomon's Psalm describes. This is why we see some ten instances of the admonition for the son to heed the instruction of his father in the proverbs.

he proverbs are not devoid of admonition to the parents, though. "Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying" (Prov. 19:18). As parents, we need to be mindful of our duties and responsibilities to lead; not just the responsibility of our children to follow. Yes, it may be that despite our best efforts, our children will choose not to live lives that make us happy for our heritage of the Lord, but it still remains our responsibility to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Eph. 6:4) and help them to be joyous parts of our lives that our Heavenly Father intended them to be. [Via The Gatesville Worker, June 17, 2001] &

INFLUENCE

By Bob Myhan

nfluence is defined as “the power to produce an effect without using force” (The World Book Dictionary). Influence, therefore, is a type of indirect operation. Many seem to think that brute force is the only tool at their disposal in bringing about a desired effect in others. But influence can be a much greater power than brute force. It is from the same Latin root as the word, “influenza.” This means our actions and attitudes are contagious.

he apostle Paul tells us, “Evil company corrupts good morals” (1 Cor. 15:33). It is for this reason that impenitent members must be withdrawn from (1 Cor. 5:1-13).

olomon’s foreign wives adversely influenced him not only to worship idols himself but to encourage and enable others to do so, as well (Exodus 34:10-16; Deut. 7:1-5; 17:17; 1 Kings 11:1-13). During the divided kingdom period, the people of Israel adversely influenced the priests. This had been predicted by Hosea. “And it shall be: like people, like priest. So I will punish them for their ways, And reward them for their deeds” (Hosea 4:9). The punishment was ending the northern kingdom.

od expects Christians to have a positive influence on those who are yet in the world (Matt. 5:13-16). We must, therefore, be careful not to cause anyone to stumble (Luke 17:1-2; 1 Cor. 8:1-13).

hose whom Christians influence fall into two groups: those they know they are influencing and those they do not know they are influencing. However, Christians can make sure their influence is positive on both groups. At least four things are necessary to this end. First, they must be sincere, rather than hypocritical (Matt. 23:1-4; 1 Thess. 4:9-12; James 2:1-9). Second, they must refuse to compromise, or sacrifice the truth (Matt. 6:24; 2 John 10-11). Third, they must have “a good name, or reputation (Prov. 22:1). And fourth, they must be willing to serve others (Matt. 23:11; Rom. 12:18-21). Are you having a positive or negative influence on the lives of others? &